A woman is a curious creature. We all claim that it is not about the sex. We tell ourselves sex is only gratifying if it accompanied with emotional fulfillment, that “sex” is an act of love making. We say it is fine with us to fake orgasms because we are “in love.” What we really appreciate is the cuddle time afterwards, (assuming he is not sound asleep and snoring like an English bulldog while hogging the only dry spot in the bed). Our feminine ancestors taught us it is our job to please our man whether that be in the kitchen or in the bedroom. Our needs were not even recognised compared to that of the man. In fact, they were discounted entirely. We have come a long way since then. Now we have the right to vote and say “no dear, not tonight.” We can initiate sex, but be careful not to be too forward lest you be branded a floozy. To all this, I say “bull shit.” Deep down we have sexual urges and fantasies just like men do. The only difference is that we don’t talk about them openly and we are a bit shy about asking our sexual partners to grant us our sexual fantasies like a genie grants wishes. The issue is: what can men do to elicit our deepest, most intimate sexual fantasies?
Laying the Groundwork
One must realize that your sex life is not going to change overnight. There are steps that a man must take to make his woman feel secure and ready to take the plunge into the deep waters of revealing her fantasies. So don’t bring home a pink fuzzy thong and think she is going to unleash her wild side right there on the kitchen floor. She needs to want you so badly and it is your job to make that happen. You can start by raising the bar and doing away with the mundane sex she has become accustomed to. Do the unexpected and turn your bedroom into a romantic love palace while she is out with the girls or shopping. Seduce her by putting a few scented candles around the room and a bottle of chilled wine. Consider the idea of some tasteful yet sexy lingerie placed on the bed to spark the ol’ flames. Have some sexy mood music ready as silence can exacerbate apprehension when navigating uncharted territory. Now that you have set the mood with the proper ambiance, the most difficult thing for most men is to take it slow. Make her wait for it. Shower her with long alluring kisses while caressing her thigh. Speak to her in a quiet, sexy manner that reassures her you are there to please her and explore her needs. Ask her gently if there is any fantasy you can fulfil. She may or may not be ready to reveal her deepest fantasies but do not equate that with failure. As I mentioned, this is a slow process. Obviously, you have lured her into a delicious love making tonight. Make sure you mix it up without being too radical. So, something other than missionary style is advisable. Make her orgasms your priority!
Revealing Her Secret Sexual Fantasies
I would place a bet that the two of you had awesome sex last night. Hopefully cheeks are still flushed this morning and a knowing grin washes over you when you see the sparkle in her eye. Good job, you have opened the door to coaxing out that wild woman. Time to start gently probing. Ask her about her sexual fantasies. If she seems a bit shy, maybe you could role play as you bask in the glow of last nights love fest and tell her you will grant her three sexual fantasies. All she needs to do is reveal their nature and you will be her love slave and get the job done. Do not be afraid to have fun and be sexy at the same time. Comic relief can break down barriers as well. Tease her with flirty conversation to elicit her secrets. If she is open to new ideas but is reluctant to share her secret sexual urges, offer up a team effort in exploration of new and exciting ways to connect on a sexual level. You both could have a lot of fun discovering all the kinky sex toys available on the market today. However, a word to the wise: don’t make the mistake of only focusing on sex. During this transitional period remember to continue the seduction. Compliment her, stroke her, hold her hand and make each moment a new adventure. Before you know it, she will be surprising you with some playful toys or naughty lingerie and all because you were patient enough to earn her trust.